Evil thang.

April 11, 2017 Tuesday

I've gained a half inch in my upper arms! Yay! Two weeks into Fighter's Codex and already seeing some results. Er, not that I'm able to give it a full shot. I don't have the strength, stamina, or time to hit all the sets like I should, so I'm only getting about five minutes worth of exercise or so a day. But, just from that little bit, results! Yay!

Fighter's Codex is a workout program from DAREBEE.

Fighter's Codex is a martial art style training program for general fitness. It is a high intensity workout regimen that will streamline and tone and give your body strength and agility. It's 100% no-equipment and home friendly program. It is suitable for a beginner and it will work for a pro, too. You will practice kicks and punches, work on your flexibility and balance and even learn some fighting techniques while getting fit. From a training point of view it will physically transform you to a martial artist. If you already do some martial arts it will take you to an entirely new level in 30 days.

The Fighter's Codex is a forge. It will take the raw power that is "you" and, over 30 days, turn it into a highly efficient, potentially lethal, kick-ass, fighting machine. You could be new to this or you may already be doing some martial art, it's designed to benefit you regardless. Go through each day, pick a level (where appropriate) and follow through the exercises. If you're not sure about the execution of any of them check out the videos in our exercise library.

There are performance, practice and recuperation days all built into this. It is designed to increase your speed, stamina, strength, flexibility, tendon strength and motor-coordination skills. You will perform some of the training routines practiced by world class martial artists. It will make you aware of your body and the way it moves in a way you have never quite been before. Those who go through it get to meet their badass self on the other side of the 30 days.

Closest thing I can get to being in a dojo again. Goodness gracious, how I miss formally practicing martial arts. Maybe someday again, eh?

Anywho, I had a semi-awkward tax return yesterday. Not because of anything the customer did.

He was a preacher, and obviously a man of God. He was calm, quiet, and kind. It's easy to spot a good Christian. He was nothing like that in-your-face butthole who claimed to be a preacher that I had in here a few weeks ago. Also very easy to spot a bad Christian. That dude was not a man of God. There's also a big difference in being traditional versus being oppressive.

I rather enjoyed his company. We chatted about counties we'd both lived in and areas that most people in this county are oblivious to, a bit about ancestry, and usual the stuff.

The awkward part was that I had stealthily minimized on my screen a book called the Manual of Cartomancy and Occult Divination. I had previously been working on the Tarot part of my website by getting this book ready to be posted since it's rather useful and in the public domain.

I couldn't help but think to some old lectures in church about how "evil can be anywhere; it could be your cashier, your neighbor, or even your friend, and you'd never know it". I was the evil, technically speaking. The Bible talks rather harshly about anything related to divination, and unlike the attitude toward overeating and divorce, that sentiment has carried forward to modern Christian values. Such a strange feeling, really.

And such a very far cry from my youth! I was something of a paladin as a kid. Right was right, wrong was wrong, and there were no grey areas. Simple, straightforward, black and white. As an adult, I don't even know if black or white actually exists. It's all various shades of grey and so very conditional. My interest in systems did let me enjoy knowing what my zodiac sign was as a preteen. Took a proper interest to astrology in my twenties, and pretty much started diving deeper into the occult. Astrology, palmistry, cards, numerology, and little things that are probably long forgotten by or just uninteresting to most occultists.

I don't think I can call myself an occultist yet though. According to my dictionary, "occultist" is a hyponym of things like enchantress, magician, psychic, sorcerer, thaumaturgist, witch, and wizard. (No warlock...? Where's the love for the male witches?) I sure ain't goin' toward spellcraft. I know how to cast a few spells with Tarot cards, but spells tend to involve components and space I don't have. Incense, candles, blessing a corner of the house, and stuff like that. Another definition says an occultist is just somebody that believes in the supernatural. (Well, there's practically every religion ever.) For now, I'm leaning more toward the mathematical and logical aspects, such as reading stars and hands. Under the assumption the position of the earth and heavenly bodies can affect a person, yes, star reading is pretty logical. Direct cause and effect. I sure won't be summoning spirits. They dead, let them sleep. I sure wouldn't want to be bothered by the living and their petty problems if I was dead! Unless maybe it was my descendants. I wouldn't mind making sure they're okay.

Hell, I'm not even reading cards right. Aside from the fact I don't keep my cards wrapped in a black silk cloth and then do some meditating or something before every reading, the deck I work best with is a pack of playing cards I've had since I was a kid. We've logged so many games of Solitaire together. Card reading rules say never play with reading cards and never read with playing cards. They can be the same type of deck but are never to be used interchangeably. Oh well. I go with another card reading rule: work with a deck you have a connection with. I certainly have a connection with this deck and it tends to give me good advice. Heh, some people say it's very improper to "anthropomorphize the deck by declaring it to have a personality", but, I've noticed a bit of a personality in some of them. My oldest deck of playing cards tends toward good advice, a silly deck I have is rather sassy, and a very new deck I have tends to be a bit naïve.

Given my raising, I should probably be rather on edge with how I'm living my life. I'd surely chew myself out if my younger self was standing here right next to me. She'd probably think I was a total stranger. But, I'm more at peace out and away from church, dabbling in weird things, than I was when I was in church. Rather than believing that evil and danger lurk around every corner, I've gone out and explored all these horrible things I was told to avoid. Er, not that is something that came with age. As soon as I had opportunity to find out who the great and terrible Dagon was I can't say I had any fear of him. Granted, the first description I found made him out to be something of a merman who was the second most powerful god of his religion, but I'm pretty used to dealing with dudes who like to fish. Dagon was okay in my book.

Never did go chasing after Wicca after learning about it in church. It didn't make sense to me why Christians feared Wiccans when they didn't believe magic was real. Or did they...? That was another thing I couldn't figure out. Do Christians believe in magic or not? I guess technically they believe Satan can grant supernatural powers to his followers. But ain't that the tricky part? Can Satan grant powers to those who don't follow him, and then, would he? Satan always struck me as the type to be more lawful evil, like a dark paladin, rather than a naughty little chaotic evil imp who'd stir up trouble for the fun of it.

One of the weird things I've noticed is just how very Jewish and Christian a lot of the stuff is that I'm reading. Take the Tarot deck for example. Well, the classic one by A.E. Wait and Pamela Coleman-Smith. There's a priest, the garden of Eden with Adam and Eve, several angels, Judgment Day, the devil, and what looks very much like the tower of Babel. I keep finding references to the Christian Holy Trinity in several books. Moreso than the Celtic Maiden, Mother, and Crone. And then there is that Kabalah stuff... I swear, Kabalah is the calculus of occult! With Sepharial as the headmaster in that school. Heh, or so it seems to me.

Take also, for example, summoning a spirit into a crystal. Part of consecrating the instruments is to pray directly to God to bless the crystal and summoning circle.

Oh well. The Christians I spent the most time with growing up were the oppressive type, and I figure if I'm already going to Hell because I'm female (they were stupid, don't ask), then I'll make sure I've got a ticket to Hell that I've earned of my own accord based on what I achieved in life rather than received at conception.

Shortly after, I found this:

Oh, Jesus, my brain did a thing and I regret my entire existence! It combined "not by the hair of my chinny, chin, chin" from the Three Little Pigs, and, "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned." Now it's "Forgive me, Father, for I have sinny, sin, sinned" forever. There's no turning back.

"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinny, sin, sinned." Emotie: =P

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